I was planning on going in a different direction this week, but I have been receiving so many questions that I decided to tackle some of those for the time being. It will still be the Truth.
Dear Truthfully Speaking,
I am a divorced mother of four and I am having the hardest time getting my 15 year old son to listen to me. He yells at me like I am one of his friends in the street. What should I do and how can I change that behavior before we move to a major new city and he is exposed to a lot more different things than he is used to seeing here?
Divorced Mom, Smalltown, USA
Dear Divorced Mom,
Let me first start this by saying that I admire you for raising four children as a divorced mother. That’s a hard job for anyone. Now, anyone that knows me knows that I don’t tolerate disrespect from children. I grew up in a time that you just rarely saw that happening so I have no patience for it. Truthfully Speaking, I feel that once a child reaches about 6 years old, you have a parental right to either hit them in the throat or the stomach. And sometimes both if they are acting out enough. By hitting them in the throat, they start to rethink talking so much. By hitting them in the stomach, it takes away their ability to breathe which also slows them down from a lot of ripping and running. I know that I am probably going to receive a lot of emails on this, but that is part of the problem now. We have gotten so soft on our kids and we are actually providing a severe injustice; not only to them, but also to society. We are now living in a society that believes in timeout. We have spoiled our children so much that timeout is a joke. You are going to send me to my room where EVERYTHING is. Thanks Mom!! That may work on a teenager when you can start taking away cellphones, cars, the ability to hang out on the weekend, but with children….I don’t think so. We are now living in a society that teaches every child that there are no losers, they are all winners. What the peanut butter and jelly is that? We are giving these kids false realities of how the world works. I believe that if you lay the law down to a child when they are very young, you won’t suffer the severe discipline issues when they get older.
We have gotten away from the concept of a village raising a child. We no longer care about whom our children are hanging out with or who they are being influenced by. I would love to sit here and blame this all on society, but it wouldn’t be me. It all comes back to the parents. We have ALLOWED society to dictate to us how to raise our children. They have handcuffed us and given the keys to the kids. And that is going to handcuff this nation. The same kids that we are afraid to truly discipline today are going to be the same kids that murder someone in your family tomorrow. Sounds extreme, but it is true.
Truthfully Speaking, it may seem late, but it is time to take back control. I think one of the biggest things that parents have to start doing is to stop providing so many options. Understand that your home is NOT a democracy. You are Michael Jackson and they are Tito. And every now and again you need to show your child that you can be Joe. Pick one, Crazy Joe or Joe Jackson. The problems that Divorced Mom is facing are going to be hard to overcome because a pattern has been established. It HAS to start young, but it is never too late to lay down the law. Your house, your rules. That is my Truth and I am sticking to it. Remember, Love God, Love You and Love people.
